There are an army of things that happen at a restaurant to ensure that our dinner experiences go off without a hitch. Many a chef, cook, dishwasher, server, bartender etc are busting their collective ass just so that our meal is deliciously prepared & our every need is taken care of while we are at the table.
I have seen & heard my fair share of restaurant patrons behave like no more than knuckle dragging, mouth breathing, morons who expect their server/bartender or whomever to bow down to them as if they hung the moon. Well I have had enough. I'm so sick of seeing articles & blog posts on tipping yet never once seeing a mainstream media outlet tackle the other side of things. Namely the "how not to act like a horrible diner" side of things. So I present to you actual situations that I have witnessed so that you will no not behave in this manner. However, if you are reading this blog I have to assume that you would never behave in this way in first place.
1. At one of the finest restaurants in the city a woman followed the hostess as she was seating a party that this woman was not a member of. This woman proceeded to berate the hostess, AS THE HOSTESS WAS SEATING THE OTHER PARTY, because the woman was upset that she had not been seated. This was on an extremely busy Saturday night mind you. Guess what people? If you want to dine at one of the most sought after restaurants in town on a weekend you are going to have to wait. Thats just the way it goes. Especially if you have a reservation at the prime dining time which in Memphis seems to be anywhere between 630-800 pm.
2. A couple seated at the bar, waiting for a table, again on a weekend at prime dining hours, said to the bartender "why should we wait? Tell me about the food? Why is this restaurant soooo outstanding that we should wait here for a table as opposed to just go over to Applebee's or something?" As they are bitching at their bartender the hostess is attempting to set the table behind them so they can be seated at it but these jerks won't bother to get out of her way so she can do so.
3. Don't act like you own the place no matter who you are. Don't go into the restaurant before it's open for the evening ON A REGULAR BASIS & just expect to be waited on as if the staff doesn't have five million things to do before opening. Thats just not cool. Get over yourself.
4. Don't call a restaurant up & request that a bottle of wine be delivered & served to a specific table & then get upset because they restaurant informs you that they charge gratuity for that. Aren't they providing a service? Aren't they serving the wine, keeping the glasses full, keeping it chilled & what not?
5. Don't bring wine to a restaurant with a wine list & expect them to not charge you corkage. Especially don't inform a server that you are not ever charged corkage you simply offer a taste of your wine in exchange. Let him or her decide that you jerk.
6. At a very fine dining restaurant in Memphis one idiot actually took artwork off the wall & placed it over the air conditioning vent because he was too cold.
7. If you can't get a reservation don't just walk in at the time you wanted & expect to be seated. The chances are practically zero that you will be seated at a 30 seat restaurant at 8:00 p.m. on a busy Saturday. No matter who you are.
Chipotle Chocolate Tofu Pudding, Salted Sorghum Granola, and Cashew Cream - **Next week, be sure stop by the very festive MFM winter market in downtown Memphis on Saturday, Dec. 14 -- we'll be there with copies of The Southern Vege...
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